1st Peter 3

Wives and Husbands (3:1-7)

¹Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, ²when they see your respectful and pure conduct. ³Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— ⁴but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious. ⁵For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, ⁶as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening.

⁷Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.

This passage addresses Christian women who are married to unbelievers. It follows a conventional pattern that is also found in 1 Timothy 2:9-10. “ … ⁹women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire, ¹⁰but with what is proper for women who profess godliness—with good works.”

The hope is that the women’s behavior will convert the unbelieving husbands, similar to 2:12 where Christian behavior might convert suspicious outsiders. (“Keep your conduct among the Gentiles honorable, so that when they speak against you as evildoers, they may see your good deeds and glorify God on the day of visitation.”)

Outward appearances are to be renounced in favor of what is precious in God’s sight. Verse 4 echoes Matthew 5:5 and his characterization of Jesus (11:29; 21:5).

“Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.”

“Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.”

“Say to the daughter of Zion, ‘Behold, your king is coming to you, humble, and mounted on a donkey, and on a colt, the foal of a beast of burden.’”

The wife’s inner, Christian virtue remains invisible to her pagan husband. He sees her behavior, which conforms to cultural norms, but only believers perceive its true value. Only if the husband becomes a believer will he then see what others already know.

It should be noted that although the section opens with “be subject,” it does not suggest that women are to tolerate abuse or harassment from their husbands. Paul presumes that Christian and non-Christian can live together in harmony. 1 Corinthians 7:12-15 reads:

“¹²To the rest I say (I, not the Lord) that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever, and she consents to live with him, he should not divorce her. ¹³If any woman has a husband who is an unbeliever, and he consents to live with her, she should not divorce him. ¹⁴For the unbelieving husband is made holy because of his wife, and the unbelieving wife is made holy because of her husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy. ¹⁵But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you to peace.”

Unlike Christian wives addressed in 1 Peter, the wives of patriarchs, e.g., Sarah, were not married to unbelieving husbands. These wives adorned themselves by obeying their husbands. Obedience is substituted for external cosmetics, clothes or jewelry. Because these women had husbands, who were obedient to the Word obedience is singled out as their virtue. However, this passage does not suggest that Christian wives should follow the religion of their husbands, whether unbelievers in the 1^st century or other religions in the 21^st century.

The exhortation to husbands (v. 7) is similar to other NT passages (Eph 5:25-33; Col 3:19).

“²⁵Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, ²⁶that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, ²⁷so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. ²⁸In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. ²⁹For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, ³⁰because we are members of his body. ³¹“Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” ³²This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. ³³However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.”

“¹⁹Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them.”

Unlike the previous passage, v. 7 assumes that the wife is a fellow believer, an heir of grace. Both will participate in prayer.

Suffering for Righteousness’ Sake (3:8-12)

⁸Finally, all of you, have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind. ⁹Do not repay evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary, bless, for to this you were called, that you may obtain a blessing. ¹⁰For “Whoever desires to love life and see good days, let him keep his tongue from evil and his lips from speaking deceit;¹¹ let him turn away from evil and do good; let him seek peace and pursue it. ¹²For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous, and his ears are open to their prayer. But the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.”

Verse 7 provides a transition into a passage on communal concord addressed to all members of the Christian community. The quotation from Psalm 34:12-16 (vv. 10-12) also provides a transition to the next section, which expands the earlier discussion of suffering.

          The list of virtues in v. 8 concludes with a warning to not retaliate, and echoes 1 Corinthians 4:12-13 and Luke 6:28.

“¹²When reviled, we bless; when persecuted, we endure; ¹³when slandered, we entreat.”

“²⁸Bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you.”

The quoted psalm is a reminder that those who do not live as God intends cannot expect God to attend to their prayers. The suggestion to respond with a ‘blessing’ need not mean that we suddenly spout prayers. It could mean quiet words of respect, sympathy, or even disagreement. It suggests that God hears not only our prayers, but also how we speak to one another and about one another.

The Righteous Accept Unmerited Suffering (3:13-17)

“¹³Now who is there to harm you if you are zealous for what is good? ¹⁴But even if you should suffer for righteousness’ sake, you will be blessed. Have no fear of them, nor be troubled, ¹⁵but in your hearts honor Christ the Lord as holy, always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you; yet do it with gentleness and respect, ¹⁶having a good conscience, so that, when you are slandered, those who revile your good behavior in Christ may be put to shame. ¹⁷For it is better to suffer for doing good, if that should be God’s will, than for doing evil.”

This section begins with a paradox, but believers know that they can be falsely accused for wrongdoing (see 2:11-12).

“¹¹Beloved, I urge you as sojourners and exiles to abstain from the passions of the flesh, which wage war against your soul. ¹²Keep your conduct among the Gentiles honorable, so that when they speak against you as evildoers, they may see your good deeds and glorify God on the day of visitation.”

          V. 14 echoes the beatitude on those who practice righteousness (Mt 5:10) – “Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness’ sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.” Here, the harm is the fear and anxiety caused by verbal attacks. The prescriptions found in v. 15 will soothe both their hearts and when they are verbally attacked. The verse reinforces the exhortation found in v. 9 (see above).

          In 1:10, Peter refers to the prophets of old. Here (vv. 14-15), he bases his advice on Isaiah 8:12-13, demonstrating the Christian meaning of the prophets’ words.

“¹²Do not call conspiracy all that this people calls conspiracy, and do not fear what they fear, nor be in dread. ¹³But the Lord of hosts, him you shall honor as holy. Let him be your fear, and let him be your dread.”

In short, believers are reminded that God will judge their persecutors. To repeat the words of v. 17, “it is better to suffer for doing good, if that should be God’s will, than for doing evil.”

Christ’s Suffering Made the Unrighteous Holy (3:18-22)

“¹⁸For Christ also suffered once for sins, the righteous for the unrighteous, to bring you to God. He was put to death in the body but made alive in the Spirit. ¹⁹After being made alive, he went and made proclamation to the imprisoned spirits— ²⁰to those who were disobedient long ago when God waited patiently in the days of Noah while the ark was being built. In it only a few people, eight in all, were saved through water, ²¹and this water symbolizes baptism that now saves you also—not the removal of dirt from the body but the pledge of a clear conscience toward God. It saves you by the resurrection of Jesus Christ, ²²who has gone into heaven and is at God’s right hand—with angels, authorities and powers in submission to him.”

The example of Christ as the suffering servant reminds readers once again that their present difficulties are trivial compared to what Christ has done for them. This passage appears to have been composed of a series of creedal formulas describing the death of Christ (vv. 18-19); spirits after the flood (19-20); an application of the flood to Christian baptism (21); and a creedal formula depicting the resurrection as Christ’s exaltation to the right hand of God (22).

Such a formula can also be found in Rom 4:25. “²⁵He was delivered over to death for our sins and was raised to life for our justification.”

Other NT passages that speak of Christ’s death and resurrection are associated with “the spirits” raised at the moment Jesus dies and appear in Jerusalem on Easter. Matthew 27:52-53 states:

“⁵²The tombs broke open. The bodies of many holy people who had died were raised to life. ⁵³They came out of the tombs after Jesus’ resurrection and went into the holy city and appeared to many people.”

These reflect Ezekiel’s prophecy regarding dry bones (Ezek 37:12-13) and being made alive in the spirit (37:5-6).

“¹²Therefore prophesy and say to them: ‘This is what the Sovereign Lord says: My people, I am going to open your graves and bring you up from them; I will bring you back to the land of Israel. ¹³Then you, my people, will know that I am the Lord, when I open your graves and bring you up from them.”

“⁵This is what the Sovereign Lord says to these bones: I will make breath enter you, and you will come to life. ⁶I will attach tendons to you and make flesh come upon you and cover you with skin; I will put breath in you, and you will come to life. Then you will know that I am the Lord.”

One note on God’s patience (v. 20). Divine patience typically refers to a delay in the punishment that sin deserves (Rom 3:24-26). To further understand it, one should take time to read the judgment parables in Matthew – wheat and weeds, a great catch of fish, which precede the Great Judgment of chapter 25.

Lastly, in referring to those who were disobedient during the time of Noah, Peter thinks of the “spirits” as humans, not fallen angels. The application can be made in both Peter’s day and ours to humans who are disobedient recipients of the Gospel. Some continue to be disobedient, while others accept salvation. The imagery of the water tied quite nicely into the welcoming of new members into the faith 2,000 years ago as it does today. Christians are those who hear the Good News and are saved from the flood.

Discussion and Reflection Questions

(1-7) When an unchurched person marries a practicing Christian, the unchurched often expresses anxiety about the anticipated reaction other unchurched family members and friends may have. What has your experience been with such couples?

(8-12) How does it comfort you when you are enduring ill treatment from others to know that the eyes of the Lord are over you and His ears are open to your prayers, but His face is set against those who harm you? How does this knowledge about God help you to bear up under suffering with a gentle and quiet spirit?

(13-17) Many adults are inarticulate when asked to explain their Christian faith. If a challenger is not silenced by a few Bible verses or religious phrases, the Christian shrugs his shoulders and changes the topic. 1 Peter indicates that all believers should be able to give an account of what they believe. Discuss.

(18-22) This section is used as a Easter reading. If during the Easter Season, you became a Christian or know someone who did, how does the symbolism of water and the flood fit into your faith life today? Do you reflect on your baptism or the baptism of your loved ones and what sharing the faith with them means to you?